maybe you're trying too hard.

I try too hard, I do. I’m hard on myself probably 23 out of 24 hours of the day, and rarely hesitate to demean myself until I feel it is justified. I have the capacity to hurt myself far deeper and wider than others could even imagine doing. If you're reading this, maybe you're the same way. People may know you as "driven", "Type A personality", or "an over-achiever". You want everyone to always like you and support everything you do. I get it. But it all comes with the same dangerous message. 

“Try harder. Do more. Be more.”

Essentially, if you’re not good enough, do what it takes to be good enough.

Oh he doesn't like your short haircut? Get extensions.

She says you've gained a little pudgy weight? Force yourself to work out twice a day.

He doesn't think you’ll make a good wife? Buy every book about godly marriages

She says you try too hard? You keep. trying. harder.

And the cycle continues.

Why does the trait that so severely plagues us personify this world’s method to success? We prize the person who pushes themselves beyond every mental boundary to reach their goal, but at what price does all that pushing come? At what point does that person cross the line from being driven, to being driven crazy by their own desire for perfection?

If you ask a perfectionist, that line is blurry

.

I’m not going to tell you to stop trying too hard, because that’s not the answer. If you and I already try to take every action possible to fix one problem, then all that extra work will only expand the original issue. I don’t even have the professional expertise to offer you the solution, but I’ll give you what I do know: we belong to God, which means everything we are- yes, everything- is His. He loves us just the same, and nothing we do or don’t do will ever stop that love.

We can start with resting. We can start with silencing the lethal, condemning words we say to ourselves. We can start with breathing again.  

“Each time he said, "My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness." So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me.” 2 Cor. 12:9

"Just google it"

Do any of y'all remember those V-8 commercials about getting "bop"-ed on the head when you were missing the point about eating your veggies? They used to crack me up because it was such a "duh" moment for the person being "bop"ed, and you just found yourself saying, "Ya dummy, just eat your vegetables like a normal person!" 

I just found myself getting (lovingly) "bop"-ed on the head from Jesus, and over a topic quite personal to me: my consistent thirst for knowledge from Google, instead of from His Word. 

Google has been my best and worst friend throughout the years. I look forward in anticipation to the creative logo design each day, especially those animated ones, and my heart races out of excitement for the endless possibilities of what's in store for my sometimes ridiculous questions. No matter what I've thrown its way, Google rarely lets me down.

"what do you do to stop your dishwasher from overflowing?"

            FULL 8 STEP DIY SOLUTION.

"Questions to ask potential employers during interviews"

         EVERY BRILLIANT, INTELLIGENT QUESTION UNDER THE SUN, WITH EVEN      

         FURTHER ADVICE FROM ACTUAL BOSSES.

"how to not be scared of cockroaches"

Okay, so Google let me down on that one: it said that they're not harmful, "just like a ladybug or a butterfly!!" Uh, I'm sorry, but whoever wrote that should enjoy some quality time big pool with those suckers. THEN, I'd like to hear them tell me once again they're just like ladybugs or butterflies. 

Truly though, as times get tougher and the future grows in excitement and mystery, my desire for instant knowledge often surpasses my desire to seek Christ. That scares me, and it should for you too. In a society where the world is seemingly at our fingertips, we face the persistent battle of choosing to find instant relief to our answers, or have faith in those dimmer, more confusing moments. I am not bashing seeking counsel from outside God's Word. The Lord continuously gives us practical resources for us to use, ranging from mentors, friends, families, books, to even the good ole World Wide Web. I'm instead advocating for giving the Bible more credit than it is often due, in the realm of seeking advice. 

Life is scary. It's messy- like brushing your teeth with one hand while doing four other tasks simultaneously. But FAITH conquers life in one swipe, through Jesus and His strength. I read an incredible quote today about faith that flew off the pages from a book I'm reading called The Sacred Search (Thank you, Lizzie and Josh!)

'You won't know what the future holds as you progress in your marriage throughout life, but what you will know is the character of your spouse walking by your side.'

Although this author was talking about preparing for our earthly marriages, the main Author of life talks about our heavenly marriage all the time. We don't know what life will bring our way, but we know the character of Christ. We trust Him for who He is, what He's done, and what He will do. 

By knowing who He is, we are set free from the worries of tomorrow, or the desperate need to once again, have it all figured out. If Christ is who He says He is, I can read His word with peace and faith, knowing He will light the way for my feet while I trust Him evermore.

His Word is a lamp to our feet and a light to our path. Psalm 119:105. 

Let's move forward with perseverance and strength, even when the troubles of life aren't clear. He'll provide the answers and the way. Trust in that, trust in Him.  

You don't have to have it all together.

This summer has been that of incredible struggle and joy, all wrapped in one big, messy bundle. As I begin my final year in college, I'm fighting that daily, internal battle of "I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE COLLEGE!" versus "Get me out of here so the real world can begin". Both sides are wrong though, because I think true joy comes from finding contentment in the present moment, not in our futures.

The uncertainty of the future has led to anxiety, mood swings, and some days, depression, because for the first time in my life, I feel like I really don't have it together. I used to be the girl with a plan for everything. I spent most of my life telling God MY plans, refusing to follow through when I felt Him nudging me a different direction in certain categories- like my career plans. The hilarious thing is I never hesitated to move when He would nudge me away from a relationship- I used that God card way too much in my early days of dating (guilty). But for some reason, I held my career plans so closely to myself that it took God prying them away from me to let me see that He has something better for me. I just don't know what it is yet, and that's the challenging part.

It's okay to feel scared, nervous, even a little anxious about the future. 

Stick with me here, you Christians who protest, " You shouldn't feel that way!! Fear isn't from the Lord!!" You're right- it's not. It's from our flesh.  What we miss though is the simple concept that we are human. We are broken. We're not perfect and won't be until we reach the feet of Jesus in heaven. Stop thinking that because you battle with human struggles you're suddenly ill-equipped to do something great in life. Personally, I'll beat myself up for days when I feel powerless, scared, without a plan, or depressed, because I tend to tell myself, "You're a believer. You shouldn't be feeling this way." This is the IMMEDIATE consequence from believing Satan's continuous lies that we have to have it together, all the time.

Lies. Lies. Lies.

Jesus loved you before "you had it together", and loves you just as much now, no matter what's going on in your life. Although He came to this earth and never sinned, let's not forget His struggles. He was " despised and rejected, a man of sorrows, acquainted with grief" (Isaiah 53:3). He faced heartbreak, defeat, betrayal, and death. He faced those battles head on by first acknowledging them before the Lord, and letting God's power move through Him to conquer those struggles.

Hear this-  God has an incredible plan for your life, He loves you to pieces, and He will provide a way for you to grow amidst whatever you're going through. Most importantly though, He sees and loves you in your pain and confusion. What a love.

Our mistake as a Christian culture is refusing to acknowledge the low moments within the body of Christ. We instantly throw encouragement verses about strength and perseverance, instead of taking that opportunity to love each other in our weaknesses by listening and acknowledging the pain! A beautiful thing happens in the hearts of many when the words, "I feel and understand your pain", are spoken. After that precious moment, bring on the encouragement. Send those verses! Write those "strength letters!" But never forget to first have compassion- love each other well.

 In 2 Corinthians, Paul talked about having a "thorn in his flesh", which lead to one of his most vulnerable, empowering encouragements to the early church:

"Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong." 2 Corinthians 12:7-10 

Some theologians speculate that Paul's "thorn in his flesh" was his depression and anxiety. The beauty behind it is what God DID with Paul's thorn- He took Paul's weakness and made him strong for the Kingdom by allowing him to persevere through beatings, persecution, and prison all because He was spreading the word about Jesus! This same power from God applies for us today- His power hasn't diminished through the ages!! He has equipped those in Christ with a strength equally matched to Jesus, which allows us to do greater things through Christ than we could imagine.

“I tell you the truth, anyone who believes in me will do the same works I have done, and even greater works, because I am going to be with the Father." John 14:12 

Don't mistake your moments of failure, fear, imperfection for truth. Give yourself a break that you have to have it all together, because you really don't. Your strength should not come from what you can do, but what God can do through you. You have the power of Christ flowing through your veins, supporting you each step of the way, and His Grace is sufficient for you. Sounds like church talk, but do you know what that means? It means his sacrifice on the Cross covered ALL OF THIS pain, defeat, heartache, trials and tribulations, persecution. Every bit of it.

We didn't deserve His rescuing love, but because He gave it to us, it gives us freedom to be real with each other and most importantly, with Him. If you are in Christ, you don't need to fear His condemnation for anything you're going through.

So here's what you do. Bring them to His feet in prayer. Let Him hold you. Then let Him empower you through scripture, encouragement from others, and through your own story.

 Be real- He can work with that.


If y'all want to reach me, feel free to comment below or e-mail me at brittavorhies@gmail.com. I mean that.

So you've got trust issues... who doesn't?

                                                         MercyMe's "You Are I Am"

Trust: how do you even begin to define it? We hear it everywhere- "you need to be more trusting", "trust me", "trust the ones you love", "don't trust them, you'll only get hurt", the list goes on. Trust has the ability to bless or abuse us depending on where, or whom, we place it. Trust the wrong person, you increase your potential for hurt. Trust the right person, you give and receive love. Trust the wrong company, you lose your assets. Trust the right company, you grow in success.

But then we come to God.

 There's only one God, and He is good and perfect. No wrong exists in Him. So why is it that we have trust issues with the Creator who made us?

I'll tell you first hand that my lack of writing in months stemmed from my distrust in Him. Being open about it is the first step I suppose, but it's the honest truth. Trust makes any relationships flourish, but a lack of trust severs all growth, love, and depth between two people, and that's how I've felt with my walk. Each day I grew more frustrated with the secrecy behind the times we don't trust Christ with our lives. I grew angry towards those who consistently pretend they are 100% on board with Jesus. I grew bitter towards those who pushed others away from God because they thought they had to be perfect. Coming from the girl who lived her life that way for 12 years, I understand. Christians are too fearful to come out in the open and say, "Hey... I don't have a lot of trust in who God is right now. I believe He's the mighty Creator and Savior who died for my sins. But I don't trust Him enough to carry me right now."

 I'm telling you firsthand that my months of not trusting Christ with my future, or even my day to day struggles, have resulted in a more beautiful, abundant relationship than if I had coasted or faked my way through our relationship. Our walks with Jesus aren't imaginary, dear friends:  it was designed to be genuine, authentic, and flourish through communication and trust. I believe that if we spent more time looking at our relationships with Jesus the way we look at our relationships with our significant others, friends, families, co-workers, we would grow in appreciation for who He is, and hopefully grow in trust. But just like we falter in our daily relationships, there will be hard times with Jesus. The hope is that He is unfailing. His love is perfect, unconditional, and worthy of our trust. {Isaiah 51:12-13, Psalm 139, Psalm 31-32}.

If you're struggling with trusting Him, don't criticize yourself for it to a point where you feel unworthy of even approaching Him with your concerns. Your times of distrust are not abnormal, and don't disqualify you from His love. Christ desperately desires the love of His people, and His sacrifice on the cross proved it.

"But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us." Romans 5:8

Psalm 51:17 says He will not turn away a broken and contrite heart, in fact, He loves when you pour out everything to Him, no matter the issue. I believe that if we as Christians spend more time being real with those around us, and real with Christ, we will reflect the grace of God in a more practical, and genuine way than if we walk around pretending everything is fine. And maybe, just maybe, people can understand why we trust in Jesus.

He is worthy of our trust and praise! You can begin by seeking out His promises in the Bible- start with Psalms, Isaiah, and move to the New Testament (that always helps me!). Finally, pour out your heart to Him and lay it all down at His feet in prayer. It's okay to be honest, He loves you all the same, but this should break down barriers in your heart that will be replaced by His strength to walk boldly.

As always, you can e-mail me with questions, comments, or prayer requests. We're a community for a reason! brittavorhies@gmail.com

Love,
Britta

Buying into the lies.

You...are too much.

You...are not worthy.

You...are not enough.

You.. are not beautiful.

You...are too far gone for Christ's grace.

Do these haunting words sound all too familiar to anyone else but me? At some point in every one of our lives, we are plagued by these perpetual lies, sometimes in just a nagging, annoying manner, other times incessantly. Somehow, someway, these lies enter our minds, flood down to our hearts, and infect our spirit.

Baking is one of my outlets for creativity, and this past December I got crafty by starting to decorate cupcakes in a more...professional way than just slopping it on there like I usually do. I was trying to make the perfect red buttercream frosting for these candy cane cookies, but it involved adding red food coloring. Loads of it. As clumsy as I am, I just had this tiny feeling that red food coloring was going to end up everywhere BUT the frosting, and goodness was I right. Without fail, I got distracted (shocker) and spilled the bottle all over my hands and apron. I scrubbed and scrubbed and scrubbed, but that dye wasn't going anywhere. My hands were stained, my apron permanently emblazoned with my mistake. Now, this may not sound like a big deal to some of you, but for the bakers out there, getting dye off your hands can be a pain in the neck. Oh, and you wasted half a bottle of food coloring, throwing money down the drain. Good one.

I think we all have to handle some form of "red food dye" in our lives. For me, the red food dye is the lies that Satan relishes whispering to me. I cannot avoid the lies, they're going to come...but I can handle them carefully, by handing them over to Christ. His hands are steady, where mine are shaky. His eyes are set, where mine wander. His focus is centered, where mine is scattered.  We are perfectly inadequate without Christ, yet time and time again we think we can handle the ingredients of our lives on our own.

"We rely on what Christ Jesus has done for us. We put no confidence in human effort...For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength."  Philippians 3:3, 4:12

Part of giving Christ the power to handle our lives involves trust, which stems from faith in who He is. How often we forget not just how powerful He is, but how much He wants to fight for us. Ephesians 6 talks about how we can tap into His power-

"Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place,  and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace.  In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord’s people."

I don't know about you, but I'm so sick of giving Satan false victory over my heart, soul, and life. "Anyone that belongs to Christ has become a new person- the old life has gone, the new has begun." (2  Cor. 5:17).  The battle has already been WON for you by Christ dying on the cross, and being raised to life just three days later. If He can have victory over death, He will have victory over your struggles. It starts with us giving Him the chance to have victory though. It starts with prayer, just talking to Him and learning more about who He is, His power, His grace, and His perfect love. And it starts with handing Him the bottle of red dye and saying, "Lord, I trust you to handle this."

It's a continual work in progress, but I'm learning to appreciate that moving forward is better than staying still.


Prayerfully trusting,
Britta

"Don't worry about anything, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank Him for all He has done. Then you will experience God's peace, which exceeds anything we understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus."

Philippians 4:6-7

Dear Daughters of God...

This month's blog posting is a guest blog from my great friend and brother in Christ, Brian Ellis. He has continually proved to be a solid spiritual example in his walk with the Lord, and never fails to speak Truth! Feel free to check out his blog "Abiding in Him", and as always, post any comments or questions you have! 

My dear sisters in Christ, 
You are the pinnacle of creation. You are daughters of God, Daddy's baby girls, His beloved. In view of His love for you, and as your brother in Christ, I wish to encourage you and share with you some things that have been on my heart in order to spur you on towards honoring the Lord with your spirit, body, and life. 

RELATIONSHIPS
Prepare yourself to be a good wife.

Proverbs 31:10-"A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies" versus Proverbs 21:9-"Better to live on a corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife."  A good wife is more valuable than jewels, she comes from the Lord. A bad wife is a curse. Many of the proverbs are only repeated once, there are only a few which are repeated many times; one of which has to do with wives. Work towards developing qualities in the areas of: 

• having a gentle and quiet spirit, 
• being submissive
• offering your body as a living sacrifice to the Lord
• having a servant's heart.

Choose who you date carefully.

The man you marry will be your leader. He will lead you as Christ leads him. He will also have an unbelievable influence over your children, especially in regards to spiritual matters. This being said, it is imperative that you choose wisely who you date towards marriage. Notice how I said towards marriage: you're either brother and sister in Christ, moving towards marriage, or married. 
Here are some tips:

• Proverbs 31:30 can apply for men too! 

"Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting, but a man who fears the LORD is to be praised." Don't date a man because he is charming; it's deceitful, it disappoints and betrays. You won't get what you expect. Beauty is fleeting...find the most attractive man alive today and then look at him in 100 years. He will look grotesque. It's here today, gone tomorrow. Rather than seeking a man who is charming and handsome, seek FIRST a man who gains favor from the Lord."

• If you find a man who esteems you higher than he esteems the Lord, run from him like the plague.  

• Look at the way a man treats others, not you! Look at the way he treats people in inferior situations, his boss, those who can do him no good. IN THE BEGINNING OF RELATIONSHIPS A MAN WILL PUT HIS BEST FOOT FORWARD, BUT WHAT YOU SEE ISN'T ALWAYS WHAT YOU GET. You don't want a performer. Spend time and get to know the true him. What's his reputation? If he doesn't respect his mother, doesn't respect women, he won't respect you when he gets your heart. Look for a man who can lead when you're married, who will be a good husband and father. Ask his closest friends about him, see what people say about him. Seek wise counsel. Look for spiritual fruit developing in his life (Galatians 5:22-23). If you don't, you're making your own bed and you will sleep in it.

Be like Ruth.

Many women are encouraged by Ruth, as you should be. She was a loyal, compassionate, God-fearing woman who exhibited the fullness of the beauty and majesty of womanhood. You can learn a lot from her, especially in terms of relationships. Read this passage from Ruth:

“Wash and perfume yourself, and put on your best clothes. Then go down to the threshing floor, but don’t let Boaz know you are there until he has finished eating and drinking. When he lies down, note the place where he is lying. Then go and uncover his feet and lie down. He will tell you what to do” (Ruth 3:3-4).  

The man's duty is to pursue the woman; he make the moves, he initiates. Boaz was the kinsman-redeemer (meaning he married the relative's widow to redeem the inheritance). He had to pursue Ruth. But the woman has a job as well: to show the man that there is something to be pursued. Ruth showed Boaz that there was something to be pursued, that he had a job as the kinsman-redeemer that should be honored. Ruth's reputation had also preceded her, as Boaz already knew she was a woman of noble character. If a girl tries to show she isn't interested, but she truly is, it will throw the guy off. Don't play hard to get. No guy in his right mind will pursue a girl who doesn't show an openness to being pursued. Be like Ruth and present yourself in a manner that shows you are open to being pursued. You don't have to say "I want you to pursue me," but you can drop those little hints in the way you act that convey that you like him and are interested. Actions speak louder than words!

Your BOYFRIEND is NOT your spiritual leader. Your HUSBAND is.

I've noticed something in dating relationships: boyfriends begin to think it's their duty to lead their girlfriends, and girls think it's their duty to submit to their boyfriends. Where does Scripture say "girlfriends, submit to your boyfriends as unto the Lord?" Where does it say "the boyfriend is the head of the girlfriend as Christ is the head of the church?" Is that the King John Version translation? Is that in the book of 1 Matthew?

When in a relationship, it's important to see if a man has the capability to lead. But he is not your leader until you are married; he is not responsible for the development of your spiritual maturity until marriage. In the same way, you should learn how to be submissive, but you do not submit to the man until you are married. A husband leads his wife as Christ leads the church; he leads her as Christ leads him. If you aren't married, Christ is your leader; you have not yet been given to marriage, you are His. You should, however, encourage one another towards Christ and the pursuit of godliness while you are dating (the same way you do with your brothers and sisters in Christ, which you both still are until you become one flesh), there is just no leading/submission. Woe to the man who tries to be your spiritual leader before you are married-God is a jealous Father who cares for His children...He is a protective Daddy and He has not yet given His daughter in marriage. 

Wait on God to give you away in marriage to your husband.

I know that you've probably heard it a million times. But it carries truth. In almost every society, fathers give their daughters away in marriage. God gave Eve to Adam. In the same way, our heavenly Father gives His daughters away in marriage and He will give you away when He's ready. Until then, delight in Him and wait on Him...His timing is perfect! Dance with God and He'll allow one of His sons to cut in.

Self-Image

View yourself as God does; Let your beauty come from your inner self.

"Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of godly jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight." 1 Peter 3:2-3. 

In society, we put great value in our outer beauty; in Scripture, 

Jesus said "...what is valued among men is detestable in God's sight" Luke 16:15. 

"Do not consider his appearance or height, for I have rejected him. The LORD does not look at things people look at: people look at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart" 1 Samuel 16:7. 

In God's eyes, physical beauty is vain, meaningless, futile, and empty...but a good spirit is of great worth in His sight. Notice how in 1 Peter 3:3 it says unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit and in Proverbs 31:30 it says beauty (physical) is fleeting, but spiritual beauty is eternal. No matter your physical beauty, there will come a day when godly women will shine in the Kingdom of the Lord like the sun- they will shine with a glory and beauty this world has never dared to imagine. Beauty here is fleeting, there it's forever and you can see hints of this true beauty in your inner being, not outer. Plus, beauty is defined differently depending on what culture you live in: American beauty values thinness, while in Nigeria fuller figured women are viewed as beautiful. The view of beauty to the world changes, but the view of beauty to God never changes, because He never changes. Jesus Himself is the perfect example of true beauty! The Bible says that physically, Jesus had no attributes that drew people to Him...He just wasn't an attractive guy. Now spiritually, He was the most beautiful person who ever walked this earth. Compare Him to Satan, who Scripture says was physically the most beautiful angel...but his spirit was rotten. As we seek to follow Jesus and become like Him, we should begin to let our beauty come from our inner self. 

Monitor the amount of social media you intake. Most of it will point you away from Christ.

We live in a society that strives for certain things, and if you don't have these these things they tell you you're not good enough and you need to change. The world encourages us to find our identity in what you wear, what you drive, how you look, how wealthy you are, etc. You shouldn't look to magazines and tv commercials to find your identity, you should look to the cross. Your identity is found in Christ and your beauty is found in the work He has done/is doing in you. You are the workmanship of God, like His masterpiece:

"I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; you works are wonderful, I know that full well." Psalm 139:14

I urge you to remember that, sister! Love the way you are, remember the One who made you makes beautiful things and He took special care in making you!

MODESTY

Address the heart, and then the hemline. 

Any biblical discussion of modesty begins by addressing the heart. This is because dressing modestly is fruit of the transforming power of the Gospel. Modest dress is centered around the Gospel because a modest heart precedes modest dress; it's the fruit of a godly, regenerate heart. Read this excerpt from John McArthur on addressing the heart, not the hemline:

“How does a woman discern the sometimes fine line between proper dress and dressing to be the center of attention? The answer starts in the intent of the heart. A woman should examine her motives and goals for the way she dresses. Is her intent to show the grace and beauty of womanhood?…. Is it to reveal a humble heart devoted to worshiping God? Or is it to call attention to herself, and flaunt her…beauty?  Or worse, to attempt to allure men sexually? A woman who focuses on worshiping God will consider carefully how she is dressed, because her heart will dictate her wardrobe and appearance.”

Read this too:

 Immodesty, then, is much more than wearing a short skirt or low-cut top; it’s the act of drawing undue attention to yourself. It’s pride, on display by what you wear.”

You see what he's trying to say? A modest, humble heart will lead to modest dress. Immodest dress is an expression of arrogance, it reveals the absence of humility. Proverbs 11:22 says "like a gold ring in a pig's snout is a beautiful woman who shows no discretion." Discretion=prudence, discreetness, gumption...polar opposites of immodesty. A gold ring in a pig's snout is something nice in an extremely ugly setting. Can I remind you that this is Scripture; this is Holy Spirit inspired. God is speaking through Solomon. Can I also remind you that back in the Old Testament, the pig was the most unclean animal. He relates a beautiful woman who shows no discretion to the most unclean animal. 

Therefore I urge you sisters, show discretion in the way you dress. Remember, YOU ARE A SAINT, A PART OF A ROYAL PRIESTHOOD. Discern what you wear and the message it conveys, and make the way you dress an act of worship. Let your clothes highlight your face, not your body. What is most catching about you? Your clothes? Your body? Or your character? Remember, a tree that bears good fruit pleases God and He prunes it to be more fruitful.

Fashion

Most fashion advice today encourages sensuality. The more revealing it is, the more sexual it is, the better. You should discern who is making these fashion trends: are they people who fear God and are devoted to Him? Or are they unregenerate and of the world? God still loves them and Jesus died for those people, so you should still love them and not judge them...but you should not be ok with their fashion choices if the fashion is sinful. 

Dress in a way that won't cause your brothers to stumble.

Before I begin, I want to say we are all accountable for our own sin. A man makes a choice in his own heart to lust. But a woman may make it harder for a man to keep a pure thought life. Some of the things women wear are extremely revealing (yoga pants, leggings, tight running shorts) and can literally be the match that ignites the flames of burning passion within a man's heart. I understand that those articles of clothing are comfortable, but when has dressing comfortably been an excuse to dress revealingly? How is that putting the needs of others before your own? How does that honor God? Dressing revealingly promotes sensuality, which God hates and we should too. One reason you should not promote/provoke sensuality, lust, or sexuality is because...

"Young ladies can be ignorant of the war with lust men confront daily. No women will truly completely know the struggle with lust that a man has. They are often ignorant of the effect of their bodies on the eyes and hearts of men. They are often ignorant that men are visually stimulated. But after this message no one can claim ignorance."

Ladies, there is serious spiritual warfare going on in the hearts of men. Now that you are aware of this, will you be a stumbling block to your brothers or will you link arms with us as we make war with lust?

Daughters of God, I hope the Lord has touched your heart through this blog post. I want to encourage you that godly men are on your side and want to spur you on in your pursuit of godliness; you are not in this alone. Continue to live in a way where the world can see the purity and reverence of your life, your utmost devotion to the King! I want to finish this post with something I've read in 1 John:

"Dear friends, we are now children of God, and what we will be has not yet been made known."-3:2 

"If our hearts condemn us, we know that God is greater than our hearts, and He knows everything."-3:20

No matter the distance you see between who you are today and who God is making you into, don't reject the truth that you are a child of God and He loves you! We are becoming, and we cannot see the end result right now! But know that God IS continuing the good work He began in you. Don't condemn yourself because of this distance either; your heart may try and condemn you but He is greater than your feelings, and our feelings aren't always capable of telling us the truth of who we are in Christ! Fact(truth), Faith, Feeling...never put feelings first! No matter how much you fail to live up to the title of a Daughter of God, a Proverbs 31 woman, a Heiress of the Kingdom of God, turn your feelings of guilt, failure, etc over to the one who knows you better than you know yourself and is at work in you!

Much Love,

Brian A. Ellis

The Victory in Surrendering

I woke up this morning to this stunning sunrise. This picture doesn't have a fun Instagram filter on it either... it was just that beautiful. Gahh, You never fail to surprise me, Lord. 

Not even within five minutes of going outside and enjoying his beauty, then coming back inside, I felt a war on my mind.  I started getting frustrated over little details, rude things someone said to me, and truly, stupid things that had no right to steal my joy in that beautiful moment with Christ. I believe war can occur on the soul, heart and spirit, so a war on the mind is nothing surprising (Ephesians 6:10-18). It is Satan's way of trying to steal God's glory, like a jealous peer sneering from the corner while the star of the show performs.

"Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise." Philippians 4:8

In that moment, I had to surrender everything to Christ, all over again, just like I have to do daily, hourly, minute...ly? (not a word. moving on). Our thoughts control every move we make, biologically speaking. 2 Corinthians talks about "bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ" and that's exactly what we have to do. 

We as Christians must be prepared to fight the good fight against all that seeks to negatively control us, that being Satan. He has no power. He holds no victory over Christ. OUR KING is mighty though, OUR KING is victorious, and OUR KING is strong. (Psalm 24:8).

Don't be discouraged when you feel like everything in life is warring against you. Surrender it over to Christ, let Him fight for you.

"The Lord Himself will fight for you. Just stay calm." Exodus 14:14 

In His strength,
Britta

Moving On or Moving Forward?

{ Although this particular blog is posted during sorority recruitment here at Texas A&M, take relief knowing that this has nothing to do with that process! Writing is just a way for me to catch my breath  this week, exciting as it has been!  Regardless, if you're a potential new member currently going through rush, my encouragement is to please follow your heart and choose the sorority where you feel the Lord is leading you to serve Him best, not where you'll be comfortable.  It's easy to go through college living in a comfort bubble, but when did Christ call us to be comfortable? Be in tune with His spirit, listen well, and go. ("Here I am, send me!"- Isaiah 6:8) }

The concept of moving on versus moving forward has been a spinning concept in my head throughout this summer. You hear people talking about "moving on" everywhere- songs, TV shows, magazines, Facebook statuses, tweets, blog postings. I was driving one day and counted eight songs about moving on in just under two hours. Our world is obsessed with moving on from whatever is holding us back, but rarely do you hear someone talk about moving forward.

 Okay, so what's the difference, you say? I tapped into the strong intellectual skills college has taught me....and googled it.

[Moving]:  capable of or having movement; causing or producing motion.
 [on]: so as to remain supported or attached from; so as to be attached or unified with.
[forward]:  toward a place, point or time in advance; ahead

Put two and two together and you'll see that when you try to move on from a hope, dream, person, situation, you're still attached to them while attempting to make motion. It's like trying to swim across a pool with a huge ball and chain attached to your ankle: not gonna happen. Moving forward, however, brings hope. Nowhere in "forward" does it mention current attachment, meaning you have complete and total freedom in pressing forward toward that place, point, or time in advance!

I don't know where you are in your life right now, but I pray you're striving to move forward instead of settling for just moving on. Agree to surrender it all to Him by laying it at His feet by just being open and honest with Him, then trust Him to break the chains of hurt, bitterness, or confusion in order to help you move forward instead of moving on. Christ breathed freedom into my life this summer by showing me the difference between the two, and although it's not an overnight transformation, it's a work in progress. For me, it means giving my burdens over to Him every morning, sometimes every hour depending on the situation. 

Trusting Him to heal your heart while also moving you forward is more fulfilling than staying attached to all that was holding you. It's not easy, but He is mighty, powerful, and strong.

He loves you. 

"Come to me, all you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest..." Matthew 11:30

"Lord, You're mightier than these problems. You have a plan for my life, and staying attached to this hurt is not apart of Your will. Break the chains. Amen."  

His will be done.

To say I experienced a sliver of heaven's joy tonight would be an understatement!! My heart literally feels like it's going to swell up with not only happiness, but true passion for the Lord's work and plan. My junior year of college is coming up, and at this point in our education, most students have an idea...or at least pretend... like they know where they're going in life. I've been plagued with questions time and time again throughout college as I've tried to piece together what life will look like once I graduate- will I get into Physician Assistant school the first go-around? Should I and will I need to work as a nurse or EMT first? Where will I live? Will I have 20 cats?! They say if you want to give God a good ole belly laugh, tell Him your plans. All I'm saying is that God must have side cramps from laughing so hard at all the ridiculous plans I've devised.

"For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.  Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. "

Jeremiah 29:11

His faithful plan rang truer and louder than ever to me tonight though while working and shadowing at one of the local hospitals in the area. It was my second volunteer shift of the week in Cardiac Care, and needless to say I was tired after a long day of trying not to fall asleep studying my anatomy book. Honestly, the last thing I wanted to do was be surrounded by more terms I barely understood, but I felt a tug to pay attention tonight. The Lord stepped in when one of the nurses asked for my help in checking on a patient's tubes. Mid-check, it hit me that we weren't just working with a patient, but a person: someone with a life story, with family and friends, with hopes, dreams, fears, accomplishments, and failures. That patient didn't need another medical professional in there- they needed someone to look them in the eye to let them know that they mattered, that they were loved. I caught a glance at the patient's bedside table to see an open Bible to Psalm 91. God gave me the courage to ask about their favorite Psalm, and even in their few sentences, His love shone mighty and strong in their eyes. In that moment I understood how Jesus had compassion for the hurting, the lost, the sick, the lame, the hopeless, the unloved. He looked at them, and loved them. Jesus's compassion for people ran thicker than blood through his veins, constantly pouring out time and time again for their sake, even literally on a bloody Cross to die an unworthy death for us.  I want that compassion. I crave His compassion, because goodness knows I can't do anything on my own behalf. Trust me, it's not pretty.

Philippians 3:10 defines my heartbeat right now when the apostle Paul says,

 "I want to know Christ and experience the mighty power that raised Him from the dead...to suffer with Him, sharing in His death, so that I may experience the power of the resurrection."

His will be done,
Britta

Scripture Cards

Summertime is the perfect time for crafts, sweet tea, and some good ole Jesus time. I've been really wanting to learn Scripture better, but didn't have a quick, efficient way to learn say, 50 of the most important Bible verses about God, Salvation, Assurance of Christ, Confession & Temptation, etc. I'm a big nerd for flashcards, but wanted something at least a little cuter and portable to put in my purse or bag on trips.

These only took me about 30 minutes to make and put together, not including the time it took to write the verses on the cards. If you wanted to be super tech-savvy, you could type up the cards on a standard rectangle format, then print those out and glue them on the card. But personally, I think nothing is better than handwriting them.

All you need is:

• Deck of cards
• Cardstock (I used pastel and glitter, but you can use whatever you please!)
• Scissors or a Cricut machine (Optional: I used the Cricut to make standard rectangles, but you can cut them out the old fashioned way too.)
• Superglue or a very strong glue
• Holepunch
• Rings
• Decorative sticker letters 

Ready to go? 

 1. Cut out rectangles from the cardstock.

2. Glue them on the front/back of the deck of cards.

3. Holepunch in the corner, then put them on the ring. 

4. Write Bible verses on them!  (I borrowed these verses from http://tolovehonorandvacuum.com/category/character/bible/ - she compiled a list of the 50 most important Bible verses to memorize! So helpful) 

Pretty easy! Feel free to e-mail me with any questions or comments- brittavorhies@gmail.com. Happy crafting, friends,

Love,

Britta 

Confessions of a People Pleaser

I'm a people pleaser.

Welcome to my battlefield. I care about what people think about me. I pretend like I can fix everything to make it better so no one looks down on me. I get upset when someone legitimately dislikes me. Yes, it's a little embarrassing. My face is red just typing it.

I know I'm not alone in this battle though. It's just that no one wants to be vulnerable enough to admit that they struggle too.

Somewhere within each person is a natural desire to make someone happy. It's not about being fake, because there's authenticity in pleasing someone out of love, but the tricky part lies in when we begin pleasing the world out of fear for judgement, persecution, or reputation. There are those of you gifted with the carefree attitude of not caring what anyone thinks, and those of us who care a far greater amount. My father is in the first category- We fondly call him the Captain, and I love him with all my heart. He was a captain in the Air Force during the Vietnam war, and was a commercial airline pilot for almost 30 years, so he faced his fair share of conflict. A visible quality of his is that he leads a life worthy of the calling of Christ, and doesn't let mere opinions or snide comments bring him down. He knows and is aware certain comments and opinions are not of Christ, and literally lets them roll of his shoulders. Now, I'm sure it's not always that easy for him- I'm sure comments sting every once and a while, but he doesn't let them become his stumbling blocks in his walk for the Lord. He keeps going, keeping his eyes on what the LORD says, not what the WORLD says.

Christ modeled the same life during His time on earth.

He was
mocked
judged
spit on
challenged
cursed at
degraded
questioned
beaten
nailed to a Cross.
for the jewish priest. for the prostitute. for his mother, brother, friend. for a stranger. for those who screamed for him to die. for those that cried for him to live.
for us.

He lived a transparent life for all to see, never fearing that someone would judge Him, or heaven forbid, think badly about Him. The benefit of that came in His faithful action of listening to God's calling to die on the Cross for us, and following through with it. Imagine what would have happened had he let the world dictate His life. What would our lives look like if we modeled our lives after Him? I believe more of God's work would actually get done if we tuned out the distractions hindering us. I love what Paul writes in Galatians 1:10,

"For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ." 

I've spent my whole life desiring to please the world, and it's exhausting. I wasn't blessed to get my father's genes, but I do have a heavenly Father who created a Son that lived to please only His Father. I want my life to reflect Him. Our lives don't have to be about pleasing the world. That's such a relief to me. If we think that God can't conquer our problems, fears, or insecurities, then His death on the cross was for nothing. He died for a greater purpose.

  "I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me." Galatians 2:20

"But just as we have been approved by God to be entrusted with the gospel, so we speak, not to please man, but to please God who tests our hearts."                             1 Thessalonians 2:4

So let's start over.

Hi, I'm Britta. I'm not perfect, nowhere near it. But I'm striving to live a life worthy of the calling of Christ, because He is worthy.

Open Your Eyes

It's that time of year again: finals are here, ladies and gentlemen, and they're about to hit full force. You know what I'm talking about. They've been creeping up on us with that ever-pervasive stench for a couple of weeks now, leading to stressful rants, sleep deprivation, cranky moods, and this disgusting, overall lack of compassion and sensitivity to the outside world. The problem lies in the fact though that we're  living in this bubble where it's appropriate and almost encouraged to "shut out the world" the minute stress is evident in our lives, but that's the most backward thinking I've ever heard. 

We're not suffering from sleep deprivation or stress overload- we are suffering from selfish lifestyles, devoid of genuine kindness. 

I'll be the first one to raise my hand and confess that I'm prone to running away when my life is on overload. Literally. I run away. I escape to anywhere filled with silence or some semblance of peace, and rarely look back. While I don't see any problem with that occasionally, my heart is rarely in the right place when I do go on my "disappearing adventures", because suddenly the world becomes about myself. My problems, my fears, my stress, my this, my that. And that's where I've been so wrong... that's where we're all wrong. 

Compassion has taken the backseat in our lives, creating this awful self-centerdness that hides itself behind the pathetic label of "busyness". The first thing we often defend in our lives outside of family and friends is our schedules- how much we have to do, how filled our day is, etc. Ask someone for something, it can be anything regardless of importance, and the general excuse often has something to do with "being too busy". However, I've learned that you make time for the things that are most important to you. You only have 15 minutes before class? Somehow you'll make time to grab a bagel, check your facebook, respond to that text, check your e-mail.Yet why is it so much harder to serve a friend in need when we only have those spare 15 minutes? 

Or how about this- you know the classic, "Oh my gosh, if you need ANYTHING please let me know!!" phrase? I want to ask you, how often do you follow through? I've been guilty of this. It's incredibly easy for us to make these empty promises of supporting one another, but we lack the genuine heart in following through. It makes sense- we truly feel concern for the person in the moment and truly want to help, but lack the direction for how/when/where to serve them. Let me tell you something though- that person in need probably isn't going to verbally ask you for help. They will, however, plead for your help with their actions or attitude. We have to become better about looking for how and where to serve instead of expecting it to magically be made known to us. We'll say, "I wish you had told me!" And somewhere deep down they've thought, "I was trying to... you weren't listening." We as Christians and human beings, need to start listening not only with our ears, but with our eyes, our intuition, our hearts. Open your eyes to what's going on in the world around you. Look up from your sorrow, pain, stress, whatever you're going through, and understand that God created a world bigger than our own lives. If he conquered death, He can conquer our problems. We're missing the boat by thinking this world is only about us. He wouldn't have created us simply to co-habitate with each other. That would have been a complete waste of time. I believe He created us to first love Him, then love and serve one another selflessly. 

As the school year winds down, let's not lose sight of why we're here. Yes, we need to be diligent to school and our commitments, but that doesn't excuse living life without kindness and compassion. Open your eyes...be kind... listen. Find that person this week who truly and deeply needs love or encouragement. Devote time to actually listening to someone vent. Set aside time in the Word for God to fill you up, and ask for patience this week. I'll be asking for plentiful amounts of it, that's for sure. Finals and stress in general shouldn't be our reason for shutting the world out or failing in our friendships. That would be giving them too much stock. Let's instead put our stock in the LORD, and  constantly remember that His patience, kindness, strength, and majesty is bigger than our problems. He was faithful before, He'll be faithful again. 

"Sitting down, Jesus called the Twelve and said, "If anyone wants to be first, he must be the very last, and the servant of all." 

Mark 9:35

Love,

Britta

To Those Who Wait

To Those Who Wait- Bethany Dillon

I am waiting on You,
I am waiting on You.
You say You’re good to those who wait.

My heart’s discouraged,
So I come to You expectant.
You say You’re good to those who wait. 

Lord, today You know what I need to do,
But You can do more in my waiting than in my doing I could do.
So I won’t run anymore.
I’m waiting on You.

Oh, wretched man that I am!
Free me from my distractions.
You say You’re good to those who wait. 

Then confession and repentance
Find me in the quiet.
You say You’re good to those who wait.
Now I know You’re good to those who wait.

Lord, today You know what I need to do,
But You can do more in my waiting than in my doing I could do.
So I won’t run anymore.
I’m waiting on You.

Oh, my soul,
Wait upon the Lord.
Keep your lamp filled with oil.
Oh, my soul,
Be not deceived!
Wait for Him.
Don’t be quick to leave.

Lord, today You know what I need to do,
But You can do more in my waiting than in my doing I could do.
So I won’t run anymore.
I’m waiting on You

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the LORD. “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts." Isaiah 55:8-9

To the guys.

"Anyone can be heroic from time to time, but a gentleman is something you have to be all the time." Luigi Pirandello

Guys, this post is for you, and I'm not speaking only on my behalf, but that of so many godly girls desperately praying for you to rise up and stand out. For those guys already doing so, you have not gone unnoticed!! Even if we can't see you, your works aren't ignored by our Father who designed and loves chivalry- "Your labour in the Lord is not in vain (1 Corinthians 15:18)".  Christ treats His church with the same love, respect, and devotion, and He expects nothing less from us towards each other. This is for the guys out there wondering, "What does and should a girl expect of me if I'm to pursue her as Christ pursues the Church?" Please know I'm not providing a formula of ANY sort or trying to be legalistic, but simply putting down some thoughts accumulated from so many girls I've talked to about writing this. Consider them.

Nothing is more attractive than a man in love with Jesus. You don't need to be 6'3, 210 lbs to be masculine in our eyes- all we ask is that you have a heart for the Lord, and are trusting His strength and wisdom to guide you every step of the way. A man who is trusting the Lord in that way and has a visible desire to serve Him is incredibly attractive. Our prayer is that you will be more in love with Jesus than with us.

We pray for you. Mind boggling to you, I'm sure, but we do. It doesn't matter if you're our brother, father, cousin, best friend, future husband, we pray for you. My main prayer for the godly men in my life is "for the Lord to strengthen, bless, and uphold them throughout their daily lives, for them to run wholeheartedly towards Christ, and pursue a life modeled after Him." I know that one day God will bring a man into my life who'll become my husband, and even though I don't know who he is, I pray for him every single day. My hope is that one day I'll get to see God's glory come full circle by discovering which prayers He answered and when.

Your words are held to high esteem. When you take the time to uplift, encourage, and inspire us towards Christ, it makes us want to move mountains! You encourage us to "press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called us heavenward in Christ Jesus." (Phil 3:14), and some days that encouragement is just the thing we need. We don't expect everything that comes out of your mouth to be all "C.S. Lewis", because let's get real- that's not everyone's gift, and we understand that! Sometimes all it takes is a, "Thank you for ____", or even, "Hey, I'm really proud of you." On the flip side, your words can tear us down in a second. Phrases such as "Shut up", "Get over here", "Hey thunder thighs"(oh yes, I've heard it) and other derogatory words, hurt us deeply even when you're joking. Be gentle with our hearts, please. Don't purposefully lead us on if you have no intentions beyond friendship with us, and if you do, make those intentions known. We love clear communication; it certainly makes life a little easier for everyone. 

Manners still go a long way. There are some girls out there who don't appreciate men opening doors for them, offering their seat on the bus, paying, pulling out her chair for her, being on time, etc. Our only explanation is that we often feel bitter towards chivalry because we rarely see it anymore, so instead we've become cynical and doubtful. We love when you prove us wrong though! It speaks volumes about your character. 

The little things count. This could be taking five minutes out of your day to call us just to see how we're doing, reminding us of things you like about us that we may not know, a big bear hug, quality time without cell phones/technology, random acts of kindness, even praying for us! If you're sitting there thinking, "I'm not creative though!!" or "Maybe if I had time..."- don't worry, all it takes is a genuine heart with sincere intentions.  Promise. When you make the time to go out of your way for us, we notice and appreciate it more than words can explain. 

I'm sure there are so many things I'm missing- trying to share girls' thoughts is like trying to count the drops of water in an ocean... only God knows the number. And I know there are many things you guys wish you could say to us. Girls are always asking each other, "What do you think he's thinking?!", so by all means, feel free to let us in sometimes. We're on equal playing ground in that no side is better than the other, and we're blessed to be able to hold each other accountable! I love what Paul says in Philippians 2:1-4,
"So if there is any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy, complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves.  Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others." 

All that is within me wants to believe that chivalry is not dead, that there are not only true gentlemen out there, but strong gentlemen of Christ devoted to His cause, yet all I see and hear is society screaming back, "Dream on." And dream I will.



Prayerfully hoping,
Britta